I’ve always been really, really terrible at introductions but here goes…
I’m 18 years old and live in the east of Scotland. My name’s Gemma. I’m about to go into my second year at uni, where I’m studying Animal Biology, though I don’t really have a clue what I’d like to do career-wise. I suffer from social anxiety and depression, both of which are severe and have had a massive (and frequently devastating) impact on my life. I’ve had social anxiety perhaps my whole life, or at least since the age of four, when I first recall experiencing anxiety/ panic symptoms. It has only worsened as I’ve gotten older, as has the depression. I first remember feeling suicidal when I was 14, but when I look back, I can see mild depression going back to the age of 13 or 12, perhaps younger. I’ve been seeing various mental health professionals for just under 3 and a half years, and I’ll finally be seeing a psychologist for CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) soon. Hopefully it’ll help me to see the faults in my automatic thinking and make somewhat of an improvement.
I have an old blog which I used to post on rather infrequently, but I’d prefer to start afresh with a new one for various reasons. I’m not sure how often I’ll update this one. I’m starting this blog first and foremost as a place to ‘vent’/ share my thoughts and feelings with anyone who happens to stumble upon on it. I hope it will give an idea of what it’s like to live with social anxiety and depression, and make fellow sufferers feel less alone in the struggles they face in day-to-day life. I’m perhaps being a tad optimistic, but perhaps I can also use this blog to track any small steps I make in beating my anxiety and improving my mood. Hopefully, I can also share with others what has and hasn’t helped with aspects of either condition in various situations.
Anyway….that’s pretty much all I’m going to say for now. I’m never good with ending posts either. I feel a bit anxious even about posting this but I suppose doing so is a another step in the right direction. I’m going to write another post, or a series of them on the subject of how both conditions have affected me and various areas of my life, within the next week or so.