So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish

I’ve decided that instead of changing the URL of my blog, I will instead make a new blog and copy a link here once it’s up and running. So watch this space! Thank you to everyone who has read and/ or commented on this blog over the last 12 years (I can’t believe it’s been so long!)

Before I wind things up here, I thought I’d do a brief post on everything that’s happened over the last 3 and half years (since I last blogged regularly). A LOT has happened in that time, but for this post, I’ll aim to focus on the positives (because despite the many challenges, I think it’s good to remind myself that there have been a lot of positives too).

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My partner and I finally got to see each other again in June 2020 after 10 weeks apart due to the COVID-19 pandemic. In hindsight, I wish we hadn’t bothered following the rules so strictly as I don’t think anyone else did, and being apart for long wasn’t great for either of us. But we did what we thought was best for other people at the time. We were so, so happy to see each other again after so long. We went on a bunch of ‘tourists in our own city’ walks that summer and early autumn. I remember us walking from his flat to Princes Street gardens and Edinburgh Castle esplanade – I have never seen central Edinburgh so incredibly quiet and I’m sure I never will again in my lifetime. Princes Street gardens had just a handful of other people walking around and we were almost alone on the esplanade. The weather was beautiful and it was the most surreal experience, like being on holiday somewhere very quiet.

Sign on gate in Princes Street gardens during the COVID-19 pandemic

I ended up finishing my master’s degree with distinction, though I didn’t get a graduation ceremony thanks to COVID, and couldn’t graduate with my classmates anyway with me finishing later due to illness. In August 2020, I finally got another season job doing bat surveys. It was fantastic to finally get back into doing ecology work again.

At the end of September 2020, my partner and I finally moved into his flat together. This was fantastic for my mental health as he is so supportive, and I really wish we’d been able to move in together sooner. It was a tough decision though at the time as his landlord didn’t allow pets, so my dog stayed with my mum for 6 months while we searched for a pet friendly place to rent (not an easy task in Edinburgh!) My mum lives close to where I worked at the time so I would take my dog for a walk and play with him every day after work, but I still felt terrible being away from him. Although things were far from ideal in other ways, I have a lot of fond memories from that time, including making pumpkin pie in our tiny kitchen together and the heavy snow we got that winter. My partner had just finished his degree and would get up with me for early starts, making me breakfast each morning at 04:30am before starting his day and job searching while I was at work. I would run along the canal near where we lived some days, and some days I would change straight from my work uniform into my PJs and veg out on the sofa. I really miss being that carefree now!

My partner was starting to feel a bit hopeless about his job prospects but then finally landed a graduate job in November 2020, at a company where he has worked since and is fairly happy.

In January 2021, as I had predicted it would, COVID broke out in my work like wildfire and so my partner and I both came down with it. Having to isolate together in a small flat was not fun but we made it through and kept each other’s spirits up. My workplace of course took no responsibility for their complete lack of measures to prevent a COVID outbreak among their staff. It was pretty scary at the time as a lot of supermarket workers died from COVID. I can’t say I blame my colleagues for going in when they were unwell/ potentially unwell as most people were only contracted 3 days a week but worked full-time, so their sick pay would not have been enough to support their family.

In March 2021, my partner and I finally moved into a house which allowed pets. The house was a bit run down in many ways and our landlords and next door neighbour were awful, but again, I have many fond memories from that time. I was so glad to finally have my dog with us, and now he really was our dog rather than just mine. We were lucky to have a lot of really nice places to go walking near us. In May 2021, I finally managed to get a full-time job in ecology, which I still have now. In many ways, it’s been a dream job for me, although it’s been a massive struggle in a whole host of other ways that I won’t elaborate on now. I’ve been on many adventures as a result. I worried quite a lot in the past that I wouldn’t be able to live independently or get a graduate job, so that’s been a huge relief.

In November 2021, our landlords gave us 6 months’ notice that they wanted to sell the house (after refusing to properly sort out any of the issues with the property), and we entered a very stressful period of trying desperately to find another pet-friendly place to rent before our time was up. We were starting to really panic that we wouldn’t find anywhere, but finally found a really nice house (which we’re still in now) which we moved into in March 2022. This place is a lot quieter than where we were before and we both feel that we were very lucky to get it. It’s much nicer than the previous place and feels like our first proper adult house together!

We took our first proper holiday abroad together in August 2022 and had a great time. My partner is somehow still putting up with me now, after more than 7 years together! I was also bridesmaid for both my sister’s wedding and my friend’s wedding last year, so it’s been quite a busy 3 and half years!

I’ve been struggling quite a bit with my mental health again lately, and will explore this (and many other things) in my new blog. Thank you for reading Diary of a Social Phobic!